When It's Not Rows of Flowers

If I would describe 2020, it would not be a row of sunflowers.

If I could describe 2020 to date, life this year has been nothing short of an insane asylum crossed with a rabid dog on a roller coaster that is loose on a broken, one-way track to destruction. Not that I’m in the category classified as a relic yet, but I am old enough to know that there has never been a year this crazy, this fast paced, or this confusing.  2020 is a wild ride that many people wish would stop.  I’m one of them.  I’m not a fan of the barrage of complex and catastrophic events that have occurred lately.  Some are on a global scale, such as the Covid-19 pandemic.  Some are on a personal one, such as the things I am still battling with my health and coping with it.  I have suffered more personal and spiritual attacks this year than any other to date.  Those of you who know me personally, you know the weight of that statement.  It seems that just above the surface of the water, when you come up for a vital breath of oxygen, there are enough monsters waiting there to push you back under before you get that precious gulp of air. 

I continually remind myself that we don’t wrestle against flesh and blood.  Ephesians 6:12 tells us that.  The world can’t be this crazy on its own, can it? There has to to a spiritual influence.  There can’t be this many crazy people who really think and believe the way they are portrayed.  There can’t really be this many catastrophic events plaguing humanity on such a global perspective.  Think about it.  Look at the world around.  It’s nuts.

I can’t speak for the rest of the world, but I know at least here in America there are more pressures today than we can count.  Just this month, one of the most stable platforms of American society was threatened with the Midwest Derecho windstorm.  The staple of crop production in this country was instantly pounded to the ground, along with unimaginable consequences to both the food supply and the economic outlook for who knows how many years to come.  When I saw the images of massive grain bins lying on their sides like tin cans, it humbled me to see what devastation is possible in the blink of an eye.

I don’t know much about politics, and don’t really care to become intrenched into them, but the impact of Covid-19 and the red-yellow-green status in the fifty states looks like there may be permanent ramifications for many due to the shutdowns.  America’s small business is an endangered species.  How many businesses were ordered to close when large scale corporations were allowed to remain open?  How many of our neighbors, local shops, and favorite dives will go out of business, some of them permanently, because of the mandated orders?  I personally have made an effort to hit one of our favorite cafés more often just to give them the support and business to keep them going.

The farm that my family owns and operates in western Pennsylvania has also had its share of huge obstacles to overcome.  The price of milk has been low for years. Dairy farmers are truly struggling, some unable to make a profit for longer than most would want to fight to survive.  Not only is the price of milk low, but the decreased demand of milk, due to school closings for one example, have put farmers in a real pinch.  Most people don’t understand the fundamentals of such a business. When a typical business wants to increase revenue, most just grow output.  When there is no demand for output, at least not during an epidemic, then the vise gets tightened on the health and livelihood of dairy producers all over the country.  If you ever have been around a farmer, you know that most of the money they receive from milk or other crops goes right back into the local economy.  Machinery sales, food and feed industries, and even local restaurants benefit from the farmer’s paycheck.  With crunching numbers for farmers, everyone suffers.

Not only has 2020 been an enormous setback for many countries on a whole, but it is clear to me that folks are experiencing psychological and mental struggles as well.  With the isolation that has occurred, many people cannot handle the alone time.  People need social interaction.  Fear and panic hit the world early this year, as in the March quarantine here in Pennsylvania.  High school graduates did not get to enjoy the blessing of a graduation like they should have, as the years of hard work and schooling went unnoticed and unpraised. Scholastic athletes have been waiting for years to finally be a senior in their sport, only to be told that they did not get the opportunity to compete this year.  I have heard report on depression among athletes and can see their side of the story.  There are so many pressures on school students now days.  To have the fear and anxiety of contracting a disease by going to school is a stress that my generation never saw coming.  School is supposed to be a healthy place to go, isn’t it?

Having said all that, 2020 has been an incredibly hard year for many people spiritually.  We haven’t worshipped like we used to.  We haven’t been around other believers like normal.  We haven’t’ been in the accountability of others like we are accustomed to. Church hasn’t been the same.

Do you think the enemy doesn’t know that?

In my own personal life, I have had spiritual attack after attack this year.  One battle after another has come our way.  My wife and I were expecting to enjoy a year of marital bliss as newlyweds, and instead held hands as we braced the storm.  Our anniversary came and went without any celebration at all, as we dealt with unexpected circumstances and situations.  We look at each other, sometimes wonder how in the world we got to where we are, sometimes laugh because it is so insane and unbelievable.  We felt enough opposition in our lives and marriage already to make us feel like we’ve been married 30 years, not one.  But seriously.  We are not alone.

What do you do when things get this hard?

Out of breath, my wife and I sat down at a coffee shop to sneak in a moment together.  We sat down to have a simple break and enjoy working on the things we write. We sat down to have a coffee date. She leaned over her laptop and looked into my eyes.

“I think we need to flip things around.”

“What?” I watch her hands as she talks with them.

“I think we should turn things around.”

My eyes stop to follow her hands and I simply listen as she makes me dizzy.

“Think about it.  If the enemy is trying this hard to do all this crazy stuff to us and around us, instead of thinking about how bad it is, how negative, how hard. . . let’s flip it around.”

Curious I sit and listen.

“If we are having this much opposition, think how awesome whatever it is that God wants to do with us is going to be!”

I think.  Yes.  That is an incredible concept.

“If we are living in this much crazy and this much difficulty, this much opposition and this much heartache. . . Chuck, think of it. . . our lives have gone through hell.  If the enemy is trying this hard to defeat us, think how awesome our future must be!”

She continued with her rationale.  I sat and listened to how someone had recently told her how important this blog is to them.  

I admit, there are weeks that I’ve been so stressed out that I’ve felt like skipping a week of blogging.  

She continued her line of thought even into this website.  “Maybe the weeks that you’ve felt like it has been such a struggle to blog were really the weeks that someone else out there needed to read your writing the most!  

My wife was at a meeting last night.  She text me with some news.  Someone came up to her asking when my next book is coming out because she had read everything I had available to her and was hoping for more. Someone I didn’t even know was benefitting from the things God is doing in me while I sat at home and didn’t even have a clue.  I quickly text back and told my wife I would drop something off for her and hurried up to leave the house.  I drove just a little down the road (past the row of sunflowers that the neighborhood has been gazing at) and gave her an upcoming book that is not yet published. Although it isn’t edited yet, although it’s not on the market, and although I don’t usually do this, I felt purpose and took action to help out another human being in love and care.  It is a vulnerable place to be for me.  To expose an upcoming book is something to the like of opening the window of the soul and letting someone look in.  You are vulnerable to comments and criticism, maybe before you are emotionally and mentally prepared for it.  But in the truth, my wife is right.

Wives are often right, I suppose.

I have no idea where people are in their lives who read the content of this website.  

My wife leans over my screen again to tell me, “you aren’t going to know what benefit this website has been to people until you get to heaven.”

She’s right.

So, what’s my point?

Hebrews 12:1-2

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

1 Timothy 6:11-16

But as for you, O man of God, flee these things. Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses. I charge you in the presence of God, who gives life to all things, and of Christ Jesus, who in his testimony before Pontius Pilate made the good confession, to keep the commandment unstained and free from reproach until the appearing of our Lord Jesus Christ, which he will display at the proper time—he who is the blessed and only Sovereign, the King of kings and Lord of lords, who alone has immortality, who dwells in unapproachable light, whom no one has ever seen or can see. To him be honor and eternal dominion. Amen.

My point?

DON’T give up.

Fight the good fight.  Buckle down and dig in deeper.  Let God handle the things God needs to deal with.  Keep your eyes focused on him.  Yes, 2020 is insane.  Yes, it is hard.  Yes, there is the temptation to give up.  There are struggles, battles, and complex hardships that are pushing their mighty weight on us to squash us.

But God is faithful.  He is here with us.  You have no idea how great of an impact you will have by continuing to stand tall in a time like this.

The world is watching.

2020 is watching.

You have more, don’t give up now.

By Chuck Carr