Who's Opinion Matters?

            In current light of what is going on in my world, I thought I should write today about a topic I struggle with at times. I don’t feel like I’m alone. There are millions of people who face the same struggles as I face, and we as Christians are supposed to be there to help lift each others burdens.  If I would open up my window, and allow others to look in, people would see that I have a hard time dealing with today’s topic.  If you are someone who has difficulty dealing with the way others view you, their opinions about you, or the way you handle negative criticism, then you might get a lift from this post.  

            There are those I come in contact with in life that are so confident about themselves that they don’t give two hoots about what the next person they meet thinks.  They are the people in life that can post on Facebook, and if nobody gives them a like, they lose no sleep from the matter.  There are people that are so far on that curve that they actually become full of pride, pomp, or ego as they see themselves higher than others around them.  I’m not one of those people.  To me, for whatever reason I tend to be like this, I’m more prone to the other side of that fence, as I show sensitivity to what others think and the way they view me.  Sometimes it is to my downfall.  I’m the guy who checks his Facebook page eighty times to see how many likes he has and stresses over it the rest of the day, especially if it was something posted from the heart. I’ve been trying my best to be able to overcome this for years, and am making progress to correct the weaker sides of my personality profile.  Some might say “good luck.”

            With all that said, this week has been a rollercoaster.  When my first fiction novel “The Convergence” debuted this February, I felt much like a little schoolboy rushing to check his report card in third grade.  I was a crazy man trying to check my author status on Amazon and looking to see how many copies were selling.  I bubbled with excitement, but also faced the very real possibility that others might not like the book I put so much into.  Although the book only took a short time to write, I had put months of work and effort into trying to polish it up and get it in the hands of literary agents, publishers, and people with “inside connections” to the publishing world.  It is quite a strenuous process.  The fun part is writing the book.  The hard part is everything that comes afterwards.  I suppose that is why some lose heart and steam in the process of becoming an author.

            After a few days of watching the ranking and charts enlighten me of the book’s progress, I realized how silly I was being.  I was too occupied with reviews and stars and likes and whatever else tried to flash in front of me.  To be honest, I might have been better not to look.  My wife (spouses seem to have such wisdom in matters like this) finally said to me, “this is supposed to be the best time of the process.  You are taking all the fun out of it.  You need to be relating to people and enjoying this time instead of stressing.”  

            She was absolutely right.

            It was about that time that the Lord got hold of me again in the way He often does.  He comes as a gentleman knocking on my door, asking if I’m done fussing yet and if I’m ready to hear what He has to say.  It is the moment that I often take too long to come around to actually heeding, as He often is standing there waiting for me to look His way far before the stress and worry begins to escalate.  So, I tried to listen.  And when you listen to the voice who knows you best, it is always the best medicine to begin with.

            The Lord quietly let His Spirit move over me and through me again.  I asked for a fresh filling.  In my best attempt to get His message out, I had forgotten what it was all about in the first place.  I was stressed about ebook downloads, paperback sales, ratings, likes, and commitments of people attending the book signing.  I was worried about my heart and soul being put out into the public and not knowing their reactions and opinions to what the book said.  I was worried about people around me not accepting the whole writing thing, the book, or the crazy swing that my life has taken into the direction of being a voice of hope to people.  It was a hard thing to open the window of your soul in book form and let the world read it.  But it was done.  The book was published.  I sat worrying, unnecessarily, and on my own like a little lost kid.

            The Lord is better to us than we deserve.

            In the quietness of the moment the Lord once more spoke to me.  It was greatly needed.  The way the Lord speaks is always so obvious, sometimes so clearly obvious that we can’t seem to hear it or get it. I was finally at a place that I was receptive to what the Lord had to say and gave Him the chance.  His voice is often so different than what our fears and worry are trying to convince us of.  His voice was a whisper, but strong, dependable, solid and firm.  It was like a cushioned surface for my feet to stand on placed over a solid concrete foundation. He reminded me the truth. It was so perfect, so graciously spoken.  It melted me again inside.  It’s hard to recreate the mood of the moment and exactly what is spoken to you when God speaks, especially if thoughts and impressions aren’t typed out in black and white for you, but here is the idea of our whispered conversation:

            “Isn’t it my book?  Isn’t it my message?  Didn’t I give it to you?  Didn’t you do exactly what I wanted you to do?  Don’t you know inside the peace that you have realizing you did exactly what I required of you?  Can you remember that?

            I had no comeback, dispute, or words to find to challenge God.

            “Then why are you worried about what one, two, five, or even many people would think?  Aren’t’ you aiming to please me?  I’m happy.  The message is being spread.  Relax.  See the purpose for what it is.”

            My focus instantly changed.  The Lord graciously regrouped me to see what was really important.  Instead of stressing about what others thought, I had to choose to see things in different light.  Checking my author status five times a day was distracting me from the bigger picture, which is how to get my message across to readers.  I was worrying about criticism when I should have been figuring out the next step of how to get God’s message of healing to one more person.  The world needed what God had given me to write.  I got lost in the shuffle.

            Recharged, I realized I had work to do.  I got on my knees.  I prayed one of those no fluff prayers of genuine sincerity. “God, this is your message. You get it out there.  You get it into the hands of the people.

            The next day, there were 526 downloads of the ebook online.  

            God humbled me, big time.  I wasn’t worried about my name being attached to that number.  I wasn’t concerned if I got any money from it or not.  I was simply overjoyed that 526 people now had the opportunity to read the message that God had given me to tell them… one of health, one of hope, and one that spread His name.  Once more I realized that people in China, India, Estonia, and Japan are reading this blog.  I got a focus on what was important.  I caught a glimpse of how risky it might be for people in lands where religious freedom is not theirs to enjoy would be to read this blog, or the message that God had put in my heart.  It breaks me even thinking about it now.

            And I was worried about what someone would think?

            My challenge today is for those of you who, like me, are often too concerned what other people are saying and not in tune with how God feels.  My challenge to you is to step back in your situation.  Look at things from the big picture.  Look at things in truth.  Ask God what He thinks.  If you are someone who is scared, worried, afraid, or simply too shy to take a leap out onto the will that God has for you to walk… hopefully this blog post will encourage you.  It doesn’t matter what your neighbor down the road thinks.  It doesn’t really matter if your friends are supportive.  In truth, (such as in the account of Jonah), it doesn’t even really matter what you think about the mission God gives you in life.  It is what He called you to do for Him, and it is an honor to live up to that purpose.  Stop worrying about others.  Look to the one who matters.  Ten thousand years from now, none of those negitive critics will even be a rememberance in your mind. All that matters is that you live the life that God has called you to, and that you do it now.  You truly have no possible comprehension of how far God can take even one act of your obedience.

Micah 6:8

He has told you, O man, what is good;

and what does the Lord require of you

but to do justice, and to love kindness,

and to walk humbly with your God?

            Today, take some time to be quiet with Jesus. Talk to Him about these types of things.  Ask Him for strength. Let God’s peace fill your life today knowing that striving to live for Him is sufficient, and that His obedience and pleasure is all that is important.  He is the one who called you.  He is the one who matters.  Rest easy.  Relax.  Simply be obedient to His call.

And that is all you need.

By Chuck Carr